Stationery Day

moveable feast
tradition inventing day
Published

February 18, 2016

Father Tim Jones was outraged in a local stationary store. Photo credit: Ross Parry/York Press

After the success of last year’s Tradition Inventing Day, it’s time again to devise a fixture for my calendar.

Celebrate Stationery Day by covering your desk in squares of yellow paper. Each square of yellow paper must be inscribed with the rune TAX.

Celebrate Stationery Day by buying a notebook that you’ll never fill. Stationery is the cenotaph for our literary ambitions.

Celebrate Stationery Day by asking your friends, “What’s mightier than the sword?” Your friends must then shout, “THE PEN IS,” or perform a forfeit.

Stationery Day falls on the Friday after Easter.